


Inevitably Awkward

by Aleique



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Autism Spectrum, Awkwardness, F/M, First Dates
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-11
Updated: 2018-12-11
Packaged: 2019-09-16 07:34:45
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 652
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16949727
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Aleique/pseuds/Aleique
Summary: Hermione is tired of being awkward and never understanding people around her. So Eighth Year isn't just about schoolwork, but people. She's going to figure people out, and stop being awkward once and for all. Draco advises her that some things just aren't realistic.





	Inevitably Awkward

**Author's Note:**

> Been dealing with social anxiety, awkwardness, and being autistic a lot lately, and also just depressed. And then yesterday I had a...conversation, that may have been a touch awkward, with my ex. This popped into my head, so I wrote it. I suppose I may post more chapters, but I'm not certain about this.

_It was pleasantly bright out,_ despite it being mid-December, Hermione thought idly as she strolled down to the Great Lake. Her brain tried to provide a ceaseless flow of meaningless chatter as the rest of her remembered that she had agreed to a date - of sorts - with Draco Malfoy. 

She and Draco were some of the only people who had come back for their “Eighth Year” which was really just classes lumped in with the Seventh Years. Ron and Harry had both left, to pursue Auror training, and although Hermione had other friends, they weren’t the close companions she’d grown accustomed to. And Draco had...basically no one, as only one other Slytherin had returned. Somehow, they’d moved from being at tables in the least-visited parts of the library, separate and apart, to sharing a table. Or trying - Hermione had a tendency of taking over a table with at least five, and sometimes seventeen, books. 

You can’t share a library table with someone for two months, though, and not talk at all. Early on, Draco had gotten on his knees and apologised, which was perhaps the only reason that this date - of sorts - was happening in the first place. So they did talk, and as it turned out, they shared a fierce love for academia that Hermione had never really gotten to share with a friend. Yes, at this point Draco was solidly in friend territory. 

So here they were. On a date - of sorts. Neither of them had really asked the other to go on a date. It just kind of came up that maybe, for both of them, there were some nebulous-maybe-feelings that perhaps would be worth exploring. Even Hermione agreed that you couldn’t have dates in the library, so initially they were going to go to Hogsmeade, but then the weather cleared so they’d come here instead. 

She’d reached the spot they’d agreed on, which had a nice sunny patch on the ground nearby to some pine trees. Draco was already there, which she greatly appreciated. Hermione couldn’t stand tardiness. She smiled, somewhat haltingly, and Draco gave an earnest smile in answer. 

“Hi,” Hermione started, then started, with all the elegance of a newborn giraffe. 

New Year’s Resolutions were a Muggle habit Hermione had retained, and she had already decided on the next year’s - to not be awkward. She’d always struggled with awkwardness, but it manifested in different ways, and she was ready to defeat it. Surely, it couldn’t be as hard as defeating Voldemort. Surely. 

Draco had considerably more poise, and he enveloped her in warm hug that instantly defused at least some of her anxiety over the situation. “Hi yourself,” he replied with a small chuckle.

Hermione had this habit of becoming a bit overly defensive about small things. “Sorry. It’s just that I’ve never been much for romance. It just makes me instantly awkward, because I’ve never really had the time to do much with it, and the unknown is always uncomfortable for me. And I’ve told myself I’m going to stop being awkward, but it’s not that easy, and people are just so hard to read and yet they expect me to read their minds, and I just never know what to say, and…” she trailed off.

“Hold up. Life is never _not_ going to be awkward. One thing I’ve learned, through all this, is that you have to set goals that are attainable. Even the most socially elegant of people are awkward, but perhaps less. Moreso, some situations are _inherently awkward._ The awkwardness is inevitable. What you do with it is your choice. The only thing to do is to move past the awkwardness, and learn how to laugh about it.”

“And I do that...how?”

“Well, I don’t have all the answers. Just a place to start. But stop taking everything so seriously. What’s the point of life if not to enjoy it?”


End file.
